B

At any rate, Baldwin entered on his new job with characteristic humility. He went to the palace in an ordinary taxicab, kept it waiting while he was talking to the King, and then drove home in it as Prime Minister.

• Hillson, Norman. Leader, March 6, 1937.
• Quoted in: Pepper, Frank S., compiler. Contemporary Biographical Quotations (London, Sphere Books, 1986).

When Tallulah Bankhead first became successful in London, she bought herself a Bentley, which she greatly enjoyed driving. The London streets bewildered her, however, and she tended to get lost. After a while she took to hiring a taxi to lead the way while she drove behind in the Bentley.

• Herrmann, Dorothy, With Malice Toward All (New York, Putnam, 1982).
• Quoted in: Fadiman, Clifton, ed. The Little, Brown Book of Anecdotes (Boston; Toronto: Little, Brown, 1985).

Elated by her recent acquisition of Sadler's Wells as an opera and ballet house, Miss Baylis stepped off the sidewalk outside London's Old Vic theater without looking and was knocked down by a passing cab. An elderly gentleman rushed to her aid. "Blimey," he exclaimed, "if it ain't Miss Lilian Baylis of the Old Vic." Raising her head with some difficulty, Miss Baylis announced proudly, "And Sadler's Wells, too!" And lapsed unconscious.

• Fadiman, Clifton, ed. The Little, Brown Book of Anecdotes (Boston; Toronto: Little, Brown, 1985).

As a young man Beecham was the subject of many stories relating to his dashing style. One tells how he was walking in London's Piccadilly on a balmy summer evening when he began to feel that he was too warmly dressed. He hailed a cab, tossed his redundant topcoat into it, and ordered the driver, "Follow me." He then completed his stroll unencumbered.

• Atkins, Harold and Newman, Archie, editors, Beecham Stories: Anecdotes, Sayings and Impressions of Sir Thomas Beecham (New York: St. Martin's, 1979).
• Quoted in: Fadiman, Clifton, ed. The Little, Brown Book of Anecdotes (Boston; Toronto: Little, Brown, 1985).

Please, be careful sir! I'm nervous. This is the first time I ever rode in a taxi."

The driver yelled in reply, without turning his head:

"That's all right, ma'am. It's the first time I ever drove one!"

• Jokes for all Occasions (New York: Edward J. Clode, 1921).

The first day out was a Sunday. I got the job through a police officer. Because of being a new man it was hard to got a job in any fleet. The day I started to ride was a thrill to me. I wanted to ride all over the city and see the sights without even thinking of picking up fares.

I started out at 135th and Madison and wound up at Fifth Ave. and Tenth St. There I got a little tired after two hours riding around and doing nothing but riding, and parked on a corner.

In about ten minutes I got a call to 59th St. and Fifth Ave. I threw the flag and proceeded toward the destination. As I approached 34th St. and Fifth Ave. a lady hailed me. Without much thinking on my part I pulled over to the curb to pick her up.

Opening the door, the man that I had inside said "This is only 34th St." Seeing the embarrassment I was in I told him I forgot where he told me to go.

At first I wandered around to see the town and didn't want a call. Then finally I wanted to pick up two passengers at once.

• Hatch, Marion Charles. "Stories, Poems, Jargon of Hack Drivers" (December 20, 1938).
• Quoted in: American Life Histories: Manuscripts from the Federal Writers' Project, 1936-1940.

Asimov, Isaac 1
Churchill, Winston 1

When, in the course of events, we left to go home, he went to a uniformed man at the door and said, "Would you get us a taxi, please?"

The man turned, and regarded him icily. "I'm very sorry," he said. "I happen to be a rear admiral in the United States Navy."

"All right then," said my father. "Get us a battleship."

• Benchley, Nathaniel, Robert Benchley (1955).
• Quoted in: Hall, Donald, ed. Oxford Book of American Literary Anecdotes (New York: Oxford University Press, 1981).

One day he and Mr. [Donald Ogden] Stewart emerged from Tony's to find it raining. A pedestrian carrying an umbrella came past Tony's doorway, and Mr. Stewart ducked under the man's umbrella, gripped him by the arm, said, "Yale Club, please," and steered his startled victim down the street, leaving Mr. Benchley gaping after him, lost in admiration.

"If drinking can do that for a man," Mr. Benchley mused, "there must be something in it after all."

• Keats, John, You Might As Well Live: The Life and Times of Dorothy Parker (1970).
• Quoted in: Hall, Donald, ed. Oxford Book of American Literary Anecdotes (New York: Oxford University Press, 1981).

• Brien, Alan. Punch, July 5, 1972.
• Quoted in: Daintith, John, ed. Bloomsbury Treasury of Quotations (London: Bloomsbury, 1994).

Meters 4

"Yes," she replied, still gasping for breath, "but how much more do I owe you?"

• Fadiman, Clifton, ed. The Little, Brown Book of Anecdotes (Boston; Toronto: Little, Brown, 1985).